Ode to the Ho Ho? Say WHAT?

What started out as what would be a witty diatribe about why you should avoid the Ho Ho at all costs has turned into an enlightening experience between me and this delectable, tubular snack.

So how did this start? My sister Stefanie is a huge Ho Ho fan. I kid you not, in college she would hide Ho Ho’s under her bed so her roommates (me & Woody) wouldn’t eat them. Umm, I’m a Twinkie & Suzy Q girl and couldn’t be tempted by her slutty little treat. Sharing this story w/ Maureen & Carolyn earlier in the week, it was determined I must blog about the tart known as Ho Ho and explain to you all why you should avoid and stick w/ something else. Little did I know that my research would lead me down another path.

I was curious about the origins of the Ho Ho. From where did she come? Is she French? Italian? I knew she couldn’t be English b/c there isn’t much good food out of England. Much to my surprise, it seems the Ho Ho got started in a bakery in San Francisco in the late 60’s. Hold on? You’re telling me one of my favorite cities EVER is responsible for this? Point 1 for the Ho Ho. San Francisco, home of my beloved Giants, 49’ers, sea lions, Lombard St. the Golden Gate, Alcatraz and everything else heavenly also invented the Ho Ho? Hmmm, my research must continue.

I stumbled across information about the first mascot for the Ho Ho and it was named Happy Ho Ho (wow, terribly clever). I sat scratching my head as I didn’t remember there ever being a mascot. So I Google searched and much to my surprise, I recognized the Robin Hood-esque mascot. I’m not going to lie, I totally don’t get the mascot. I expected it to be wearing red lipstick, clear high heels and Mardi Gras beads. Even though the mascot makes little sense, I’m diggin’ it all the same. Random, funky & unique. You go Happy Ho Ho. Point 2 for the Ho Ho.

Ho Ho’s are versatile. Not only are they a delicious stand-alone treat, there are recipes that utilize them. I am a huge fan of pudding. It makes me happy. It completes me. My internet search brought me to a recipe for Ho Ho Pudding. Heavenly. It pains me to say this but I am so tempted to go buy my first box of Ho Ho’s so I can make this chocolate treat. Point 3 for the Ho Ho.

Determined to find something derogatory about Ho Ho’s, I decided to expand my search to Urban Dictionary where I came across “Ho Ho The Clown”. Yes! This is what I’ve been looking for! As defined by Urban Dictionary, Ho Ho The Clown is “some clown, usually obese, who gorges himself/herself on Hostess Ho Ho’s, the individually wrapped, chocolate-covered, rolled cake-and-cream junk food, sorta like a swiss roll”. I was excited to see a link to purchase Ho Ho The Clown merchandise. Point 1 for JJ!

My main issue w/ the Ho Ho is the name. My research yielded nothing as to explain why Ho Ho. I mean, I figure they started with “Ho” and then thought, “Hmm, that doesn’t sound so good. Maybe we should add another Ho. I mean, Ho’s don’t really like to be alone do they? “. In my mind, I think that’s how it went down. Point 2 for JJ!

Finding myself exhausted from the extensive research, I needed a snack. Hmm, my pantry is still full of triathlete stuff (gels, PowerBar crap, trail mix, etc). I wonder if I should walk to the gas station to go buy a pack of Ho Ho’s? OMG, what’s wrong with me? I’m sorry but that is too white trash for me. Walking to the gas station for a Ho Ho and Icee. Umm, I’ll pass.

Friends, I leave you with these last thoughts. Don’t judge a book by it’s Ho Ho.

Thanks to Stefanie, Maureen & Carolyn for being the inspiration for this post.