Overall, I am still happy I finished and I am grateful to
have a small PR. I got to work Tuesday
morning and saw the “13” on my computer that I had stared at for weeks and
weeks and I got teary. I removed it from
the screen and put it in my purse…I just couldn’t throw it away. Isn’t that kind of weird? To me, throwing it away would mean I am
giving up on my goal of a sub-14 Ironman.
I’m not sure I’m ready for that.
After the race, I told Keith and pretty much anyone within
earshot that I was done with Ironman Texas.
On the way back from getting my Finisher’s gear, I told him I was
probably done with Ironman. I think part
of me felt defeated. I found myself
thinking that I’m probably just a 15hr type of gal. Don’t get me wrong, there is nothing wrong
with that. I just really, really, really
wanted to hit my goal. To watch it slip
away mile by mile was truly heartbreaking.
I know this is just a hobby but it’s a hobby that I invest so much of
myself into. It’s a hobby that my
friends & family invest so much into. A hobby my coach invests so much time into.
I have come so far and to have a finish that wasn’t much better than my
first just hurt.
By Monday, I was talking about my next Ironman. Maybe 3rd time will be a
charm. I’m torn though. Do I pick a destination that will offer
better temps or do I treat IMTX the way I treated Galveston and come back with
a vengeance? I really don’t know. May in Texas is brutal and I’m lucky I
finished on Saturday. There were people
far more fit than me who looked a lot worse off.
So yeah, I drank the Kool-Aid and as Dee said, it’s strong
stuff. I’m seriously contemplating a 3rd
Ironman. I am not satisfied with a 15+
hour finish. I want to do better. I know
I can do better. I will do better.
Poor Keith.
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